Who wants to read erotica? Apparently there is a significant audience for this infamous genre with some literary agents professing a “love” for it. Hmmm. Well, I don’t—want to read it or write it. However, I do want to include sexuality in the relationship quandary. How could I not?
Can we be real here? Two adults, Christians, fall in love. Some practice complete abstinence as in not even a kiss before they say “I do”. Others not so much but do abstain from “becoming one flesh” until the “I do-s” are said. Whatever. Take your pick. If either member of those couples never ponders their future sexual experience, we’ve got issues. People in love can’t stay away from each other. Heck, people who aren’t in love but are “in relationship” can’t stay away from each other. Sexual attraction dominates much of early relationships.
Here’s the deal. Sexual relationships can do a lot of damage to people. Take a look at this biblical passage:
“Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.”
1 Corinthians 6:18-20 (NIV)
“You are not your own; you were bought at a price.” On a cross Jesus endured crucifixion to pay for our sins. He bought us. He didn’t buy us so we could play around with others’ bodies. He owns our bodies. We are not our own. When someone else uses our body for his/her pleasure without God’s permission, it’s sin. They have no right to it. Conversely, when marriage unites a couple, they belong to God and each other.
Daily most of us experience sexual bombardment. On magazine covers at the grocery stores. At work observing discreet attractions or secret conversations since sexual harassment rules the day. On television—even watching the news, commercials often show us Victoria’s Secret. How can we deny the temptations to be stimulated by these different opportunities? Lust is prevalent and obvious and celebrated. It is “the norm” not the exception.
So. I write to contrast “the norm” to “the exception”. To illustrate the differences in a relationship formed with or without God. To allow the power of being a sexual person its due in the pages of story. To demonstrate sexual passion can be overwhelming. To delve into the challenge of it all and the nature of humankind. The wonder, the angst, the joy, the sorrow, the disappointment, the damage . . . all of it.
That’s why I do it.
For what it’s worth.
Lord, this is all part of your “not wasting anything”. Thank you for that. You’ve been so gracious to me. I’m desperate for you. In the Name of Jesus, Amen.